0h, shut up.

TWO WORDS :
deep shit.

im in deeeeeeeeep shit !
oh why, why did i open that bitch of a blogshop !
why ?
why ?
am i retarded or dumb ?
or stupid?
or idiot ?
or....
or... fat ?
so fat that all the amino acids are blocking my brain !

i'm carrying a big responsiblity now im supplying the whole wide now!
and guess what? the website that supplies me has.....
NO STOCK ! *claps hand*
APPLAUSES LOUDLY.
and
guess what what ?
to buy the tees need add additional $2!
then i imformed the ppl getting supplies from me whether they still wanna take cos need +$2, THEY DONT MIND!

THEY!
DONT!
MIND!

i was hoping they wouldnt want.
cos now im carrying a heavy responsibilty,
i dont know if the website is trustable, i dont know when their stocks would be sold out !
and now ?
im currently supplying more than 10 blogshops!
kill me now,
shot me dead.

BLOG OPENED :D.
i dont know why i closed but i closed it temporarily cos i dont know why i closed it.

unlike the ":D", im not feeling very cheerful now D:
im sooooooooooo in a dilemma.
dont know whether to ship 30 cher bags over,
thats like the MINIMUM amnt.
currently only have 1 order.
and 1 person taking supplies from me.

i cant like not keep my promise right D:.
on the other hand,
30 cher bags = no joke.
its $300 in all.
how the fck do i get the money.

ship? not to ship? ship ? not to ship?
wtf wtf feel like killing myself.

The feeling of getting looked down upon.
the feeling of getting judged by others.
That feeling is not exactly very rare anymore.

i may not be that smart,
i may be unsure of things sometimes,
not everyone is borned know-it-all.
there are some things geniuses dont know either.

yes.
you are all good in your studies.
but that doesnt mean that i am dumb when i dont do as well.
i dont look down on NA people, do i ?
just bcos they are fcking NA students.
you people are just so full of yourselves.
looking down on people who arnt as smart.
thinking you guys are smarter than others,
just bcos you score well in your studies.

listen, studies is not everything.
character is 10 times more impt than studies.
you may be rich, you may have a successful career,
but you dont have a heart.
you look down on beggars, you look down on everybody
and you suck up to those you think is worth sucking up to.
is money everything ?
you earn big bucks yet no one is willing to be your friend.
youre rich yet you have no one you love to spend the money on.

is brains and money everything ?
some people are borned slightly stupider than others,
some are mentally retarded.
so youre gonna look down on them, jeer at them?

you know, the feeling is sick.
i feel sick whenever people look down on me.
they think im incapable.
they think im stupid and dumb and blur and that i cant even recite the 'abc'.
they think they are so smart themselves.
they think being with me is just killing more brain cells.
they think IM EASY TO BULLY.

no i dont like to pick up a quarell and argue with others,
i give in.
BUT WATCH YOUR WORDS.
it can really be hurting.
be a little more sensitive will you ?
there's a limit to my patience.

one day i'll just show you that im capable and i make sure you shut your damn bloody big mouth up.

no. this post is not referring to you,
no, not just you,
but you, you, you, you, you and all the fcking yous who looked down on me.
yes its YOU if youre guilty.

fcktards and bastards,
i'll show you one day.
thanks man, thanks for giving me the motivation to strive.
continue being so full of yourselves,
pride comes before a fall.

cos i'll own you idiots one day. watch it, fckers.

Life's been busy nowadays.
busy with all kinds of blogshop stuffs,
yepps, aint doing super well, but i guess its okay.
probably at this rate i might be able to clear my debts.

woke up super early to meet my coustumer today at tpy breadtalk.
well she's really nice and doesnt ask for much discounts,
so yeahh, appreciated.
if only everyone could be like her.

planned to go swimming with shihui,
but she had last minute CG meeting so we gotta cancel it.
meeting Tian yi in 40mins time to swim.

well, no one's reading this blog,
but its better that way.
i dont wish to go and advertise to other people my blog anyway,
its pretty pointless,
so what if i have tags coming in every single day,
but the words i say dont come from my heart.
its just so fake.

sec3 is coming in a month's time.
time to mature up.
slack no more, and be serious in CCA.

i'll just stay in a corner and be that quiet girl.
sometimes, fun comes with a price.

Thanks 100 times to wanyi who helped me model for my clothes and for willing to wear the clothes she doesnt really like ! Thankyou so much i owe you a treat heh!x3 and i owe you your riddle answers too ! heh, anyway, whatever, LOVES!

hypocrites ; does that apply to me too?
actions speak louder than words - so, not, me.

If you throw a pebble into water, ten thousand others throw it with you; if you pick up a pebble, you have to pick up ten thousand others yourself.

Freaked out.

i'm totally freaked out by the book cover of low kay hwa's novel lilith.
really scary.
even the contents in the book are scary.

well, everyone has gone for the 2D class chalet.
i wished i had gone.
staying at home is so effing boring.
and there's no one to chat online with me.

still scared by the cover/picture.

went to get appeal form today,
appealed to double sci and hist.
there might not be a space for me in hist !
cos its like, full, i guess.
whatever.

ng kok wing told me that my chances of getting double pure is very low,
cos my percentile ranking is only 16%.
16% ! i didnt expect my sci ranking to be that low.

he said that im the language kind of person,
my lit, eng and hist is top 25% ranking.
not bad, not bad.

the bad thing was my dream combination has nth to do with these.
i didnt really wanted lit.
english is a MUST TAKE.
history, well, geog and hist, both are fine.

after all that crap,
my conclusion is :
I'm still freaked out by the cover of that book.
trust me, go google it.